How to Heal Your Money Mindset: 7 Lessons From Ken Honda

What if the amount of money in your bank account matters less than how you feel about it?

That question was on my mind when I sat down with my friend Ken Honda for the Dare to Declare Podcast.

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Ken is one of Japan's best-selling self-development authors, with more than 8 million books sold, and the author of Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money.

We first met in Nashville, where he gave me a signed copy of his book and a beautiful gold pen. I've read Happy Money more than once, and I recommend it all the time.

Our conversation was full of gems about healing money beliefs, gratitude and building an abundance mindset, so I wanted to share seven of my favourites with you here.

Before I get into that, I have exciting news: Ken is our keynote speaker at the Dare to Declare Conference, so you'll get to learn from him with us in the room.

7 Money Mindset Lessons From Ken Honda

1. Wahei Takeda's lesson: money can be ice, water or air

Much of what Ken teaches came from his mentor, the late Wahei Takeda, often called the Warren Buffett of Japan. Ken spent about 15 years learning from him, and he said even three minutes with Takeda was packed with wisdom.

One of Takeda's lessons changed the way I picture money. In a cold world, money is frozen. In a warmer world it becomes water, but

water still needs managing. Too much and you have a flood. Too little and you have a drought.

The goal is for money to become like air. You breathe in and out without even thinking about it. As Ken put it, nobody gets to the end of the month wondering if there's enough air in the house.

That's the relationship with money so many of us are craving. Not obsessing. Not fearing. Just flow.

2. Healing money beliefs starts with your feelings

In Happy Money, Ken writes that it isn't how much you have or make that determines your wealth. It's how you feel about money. That landed deeply for me, because so much of my vision board work is about the beliefs sitting underneath our goals.

Ken spent a few years doing real healing work, not only around money but around his childhood. Even though his parents taught him well, he still carried negative beliefs and old hurts. Once he cleared them, he started to feel neutral about money.

I loved that he didn't chase only positive feelings. He talked about yin and yang, and how even too much joy can throw you off balance. Real happiness, he said, is quiet. It's like health. When you have it, you don't think about it.

I shared a piece of my own story in this episode too. I'm adopted, and I grew up hearing that I arrived as a "raggedy baby" and that my parents paid only $7 for me. They meant it lightheartedly, but I made those stories mean something about my worth. So much of my adult life has been about proving I'm worth more than $7. Seeing that limiting belief clearly has shifted my money mindset in a big way.

What story are you still carrying about your worth?

3. Own your little pond: build income that refills itself

Takeda once told Ken that becoming wealthy is like having a little pond in your backyard. You can scoop out a lot of water, and by the next day it fills back up to the same level. In other words, you need an income source that keeps refilling.

Plenty of people heard that story and moved on. Ken ran with it. He wrote books designed to sell year after year, including one stocked in book racks across Japan's 60,000 convenience stores that has sold about 2.3 million copies. He added evergreen online courses.

One simple idea grew into a multimillion-dollar business.

This is exactly why I believe in simple, proven frameworks. The idea can be simple. Your commitment is what makes it work.

4. A vision board for money is the start, not the finish

Of course I asked Ken if he has a vision board. He does! It's filled with the faces of happy people, because that's what he wants more of in his life. He keeps it private, and I love that. Your board is sacred. It's between you and the universe, or you and God.

Then he said something every vision board lover needs to hear. Putting "bestselling author" on your board is a declaration. It isn't an order at a restaurant where the universe brings your book to the table. A car or a house, maybe. A bestselling book? You have to go into the kitchen and start cooking. Ken figures there are around 250 steps between the idea and the published book.

That's why I always say we put the action into the law of attraction. Whether you're creating a vision board for money, love or your business, your board gives you clarity. Your action gives you results.

5. Give, and watch money come back

About 22 years ago, Ken read that what you give, you receive. He didn't buy it, so he decided to test it. He started giving away a free booklet. Requests poured in, and he ended up printing and giving away 100,000 of them.

Then a publisher called.

Over the years he gave away about 2.3 million physical copies, which cost him roughly $3 million US. The books he has sold since then have brought back about $13 million.

His advice if giving feels scary?

Start small. A quarter. A dollar. Five dollars. That's an abundance mindset in action.

6. Gratitude and money: arigato in, arigato out

If you're not ready to give yet, Ken has an even simpler practice.

Say thank you every time money comes in, and every time it goes out. Thank the cashier. Thank your server for the meal and the lovely service.

He calls it arigato in, arigato out.

He told the story of a single mom in a low-paying job who was frustrated with her boss. Ken asked what she could appreciate about him, and she realized he had hired her without a college degree. She began appreciating him for it. Within a few weeks, she received a bonus and a raise. She never said a word to him. Her energy changed him.

What you appreciate, appreciates. That's the real connection between gratitude and money.

7. Relationships are your true wealth

When I asked Ken what he teaches his 25-year-old daughter, he didn't talk about money at all. He told her life is about making friends.

Find even one or two people you truly want to support, and who want to support you. With good relationships, you can succeed in any field. Without them, even a lot of money can drain away.

Ways to shift your relationship with money this week

• Say arigato, or thank you, every time money comes in or goes out.

• Write down one money story from your childhood that you might still be carrying.

• Look at your vision board and choose one action that gets you into the kitchen this week

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There's so much more in this episode, including the Japanese expression Ken uses for the moment everything suddenly becomes clear, and what it really means to be the Santa of your own vision board. Ken is wise, funny and so generous with what he knows.

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